ACTIVITY: “CHANGE THE MESSAGE”
Goal:
Help participants recognize negative self-talk and replace it with words that build confidence, respect, and hope.
Time:
20–30 minutes
Group Size:
Small groups or pairs (4–8 people total works best)
Step 1: Start the Talk (5 minutes)
Ask the group:
“When you mess up or things go wrong, what do you usually say to yourself?”
Write a few examples on the board.
Common answers might sound like:
- “I can’t do anything right.”
- “Nobody’s going to hire me.”
- “I always screw up.”
Then ask, “What would it sound like if you spoke to yourself like a friend instead?”
Step 2: Partner Challenge (10–15 minutes)
Instructions:
Each person tells their partner one negative thought they’ve caught themselves saying.
Their partner’s job is to “flip it” — turn it into a positive or realistic statement.
Examples:
| Negative Thought | Better Way to Say It |
|---|---|
| “I always mess things up.” | “I make mistakes, but I learn fast.” |
| “I’ll never get a job.” | “I’m working on my skills and staying ready for the right job.” |
| “I don’t deserve a second chance.” | “Everyone deserves a chance to rebuild. I’m doing the work.” |
| “I’m not smart.” | “I’m still learning, and I’m improving.” |
| “I’ve wasted too much time.” | “I can make better use of my time now.” |
Encourage partners to help each other make their statements honest and hopeful — not fake or “feel-good,” but real.
Step 3: Share and Reflect (5–10 minutes)
Ask a few volunteers to share one thought they changed.
Applaud each one.
Then ask:
- “How did it feel to hear your new statement out loud?”
- “What difference would it make if you talked to yourself that way every day?”
Remind them:
Change starts with how you speak to yourself.
The words you repeat are the beliefs you build.
Step 4: Optional Writing Reflection (5 minutes)
Have everyone write:
- One old thought they’re ready to let go of
- One new truth they want to start repeating
Example:
Old Thought: “I’m stuck.”
New Truth: “I’m moving forward, one step at a time.”
Invite anyone who wants to share — no pressure.
